Except

Came in to find that all the shifts are changing, and not for the better. Would love to stay doing what I'm doing after they change.

Except I can't. So onwards and upwards.

*

Well, at least the vehicle works. It stinks of cigarettes, but at least it works.

Except it doesn't - not to the extent I need it to.

*

It starts OK, but the flashing lights and computer screens on it don't. But at least I can get it to the people who can supposedly fix it.

Except they can't.

*

So I then spend the next five hours being told to drive from pillar to post to find a working car. Apparently you have the supposedly "bigger picture".

Except you don't. You have a severe case of LeftHandRightHandItis.

*

After driving from pillar number 4 to post number 5, you then phone me up, tell me off for not being back at point number 1, and that I'm shirking my duties.

Except I'm not. I'm doing anything but.

*

So I arrive at work almost an hour early, try to solve the problems, follow your instructions to the letter, and still get told off.

Except that you don't do it yourself - you send someone else to tell me off. Cowards.

*

Finally, despite risking being sectioned and put away for temporary insanity by screaming out loud, I have a working vehicle. I can do my job.

And just as an aside, I'm sure you felt good about getting the vehicle on the road. I'm sure you felt good about bullying one of your loyal members of staff. I'm sure you felt good that all the numbers tallied up.

Except that, despite your best efforts, I win.

*

How many of you up there went home knowing that they'd come to work and helped a mum deliver her baby? No hands up?

Oh well.

I know that I did.